NOBODY PUTS BABY IN A CORNER!!!!!!!

TEXTO DE UMA PACHANGA AÍ PLO MUNDO



Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner


I think it was some time in middle school that I learned there are two types of men: those that enjoy dancing and those that detest dancing. I immediately recognized the dirty dancers at every party I attended from that point on.
You remember them - the guys that just lived to dance.
Once the music started, they looked like one of those little white circus dogs: hopping, jumping, and running around in circles - almost as if they didn't have any control over their bodies.
I, however, was not in this group. When music is blaring, the dirty dancers can just feel it. The music somehow enters their bodies. This does not happen to me or any of the other wallflowers that detest dancing. We can actually feel the music bouncing off of us, like a perfectly thrown pass bounces off of Bears wide receiver David Terrell's hands and onto the ground.
Every once in a while, one of the dirty dancers would lure a wallflower on to the dance floor. This was always hard for the wallflowers to resist. The dirty dancers seem to have so much fun and they seem to get all the girls.
After a couple of beers one of the wallflowers couldn't withstand the urge to be a dirty dancer. This wallflower pioneer would say to himself: "Dancing can't be that hard; why not give it a shot?"
The other wallflowers would watch, secretly hoping that this brave soul could make it. If this wallflower pioneer made the switch to a dirty dancer that gave the other wallflowers hope - it meant that they might be able to make the switch as well.
Of course, in the back of their minds they knew it could not happen. The dance floor would treat them like the Presidential elections treat Massachusetts' liberals - it would chew them up, spit them out, and happily watch them walk away in shame.
It would usually start well for this brave wallflower pioneer. For a while he could just copy what his other friends were doing.
Before he could say 'nobody puts baby in a corner,' the music would shift gears, the beat would get faster, and the moves more complex. He quickly stood out like Mayor Daley would at a responsible government seminar.
As the others moved to the music, this pioneer looked more like someone doing a C3-PO impersonation than a dancer. His legs would not bend, his shoulders and head always moved in the same direction, and he lost the ability raise his arms above his shoulders.
He would try as long as possible to ignore the obvious signs that he didn't belong. By the third song, he would walk off the dance floor with his head hung low.
Only a small number of these pioneers have successfully made the switch. It can be done, but you have to follow these three rules:
1 - Practice dancing at home. Do NOT under any circumstance let anyone see you doing this!
2 - Listen to lots of boy-band music. Again, do NOT under any circumstances let anyone see or hear you doing this!
3 - Get really drunk before you get to any event where dancing is involved.
I am currently taking dancing lessons with my wife. I know I will never become a dirty dancer because I refuse, in principle, to dance at home and listen to boy band music. And my wife wouldn't be too happy with me if I showed up drunk at our dance lessons.
But I strive for something different. While dancing at the next wedding I attend, I want people to say: "WOW! That guy dances like a confident C3-PO."